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Thread: Advise for buying a pistol for my wife.

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    P245USER is offline Junior Member
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    Advise for buying a pistol for my wife.

    Good evening
    I am looking for a little info on buying my wife a pistol. She has been shooting my 45acp some. She
    is fairly comfortable with it. I would like to get her something small and compact. Any input would be greatly appreciated.

  2. #2
    goldwing's Avatar
    goldwing is online now Senior Member
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    There are at least 10 good questions to ask but I won't.
    Is it for self defense?
    What is her skill level?
    Will the gun be used for concealed carry?
    Can she back up your boat trailer?
    Does she ever get really pissed at you?
    The last two questions that sound like humor may be more relevant than the first three.
    ALL JOKING ASIDE, what is the gun to be used for?
    Goldwing

  3. #3
    Steve M1911A1's Avatar
    Steve M1911A1 is offline Senior Member
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    "Small and compact" is not a suitable description for a pistol for a beginner.
    Small pistols are experts' tools. They are uncomfortable to shoot, and hard to use accurately and effectively.

    I taught my wife how to shoot, using my own full-size .45 M1911.
    After she had been shooting for a full year, doing dry-fire exercises every day and live-fire practice twice a week, I asked her to try every pistol that we own, and that she either choose one or indicate to me in which direction to go.
    She tried everything: the full-size 1911 with which she learned, a similar shortie .45, a .38 Special revolver, and a .380 "pocket" pistol. The only guns she could successfully manipulate were the full-size 1911 and the .38 revolver. (She could hit very well with any of them, though.)

    Racking a pistol's slide was the semi-auto point of difficulty, as was being comfortable with the snubbie .38's twisting recoil.
    So we found a tiny .380 semi-auto with a locked breech (so its recoil spring wasn't too stiff for her).
    We bought it, even though I knew that shooting it would be difficult. It was, after all, her own choice.
    With patient instruction, it took her about a month to master it for short-range shooting. Part of her motivation was that she was completely involved in the process of its selection.

    So, I suggest to you three necessary procedures:
    1. Find a way to let her try many different pistols. There are shooting ranges which have pistols for rent, an hour at a time. Find one and use it.
    2. Let her choose her own gun, after as much varied experience as you can manage to find.
    3. Make it possible for her to learn good technique, and then help her practice her skill.
    Bisley and GCBHM like this.

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    jtguns's Avatar
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    +1 what Steve said. I think that you should help her pick out her own firearm, she would feel more comfortable with it and be more inclined to practice with it.

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    P245USER is offline Junior Member
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    It will be used for self defense.
    Her skill level is somewhat low. She knows he basics.
    It will be carried in her truck.
    She can Back a trailer with no problem.
    And last but not least she is pretty mild unless I piss her off.
    The gun is just to make her feel more secure traveling to and from work. Things of that nature.

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    Cait43's Avatar
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    If there is a range in your area that rents handguns have your wife try out a few handguns and let her choose the one she feels comfortable with.......

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    goldwing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by P245USER View Post
    It will be used for self defense.
    Her skill level is somewhat low. She knows he basics.
    It will be carried in her truck.
    She can Back a trailer with no problem.
    And last but not least she is pretty mild unless I piss her off.
    The gun is just to make her feel more secure traveling to and from work. Things of that nature.
    In that case I would rent a g19 and have your ever loving give it a go. The trailer backing thing was the decider between the suppressed Desert Eagle .44 and the G19 so I am glad we cleared that part up! Seriously let her try as many as possible. She will find the right one, and if she is any thing like my girl, if she has her choice it will be pretty expensive.
    Goldwing

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    PT111Pro is offline Member
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    A compact for the wife. Humm
    Here is my list:
    Beretta PX4 Storm compact 40 S&W
    Heckler & Koch P2000 40 S&W
    Styr Mannlicher S-A1 40 S&W

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    I'm amazed; it took 6 posts for the first Glock mention.

    I would only echo those who have said she should try as many guns as possible (try to find a range that rents guns) and whatever you do, try real hard to let her make her own choice, without you steering her at the gun YOU like.

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    I agree with everything Steve said.

    My personal experience is that most women seem to be drawn to snub-nosed revolvers, for whatever reason. That's fine, if they can shoot them - most can't, without a lot of practice. My wife is very late to the game, and still not terribly interested in 'mastering' any firearm. She wants to be able to shoot one, but doesn't expect to ever need to shoot one, and thinks she is just too busy to waste time practicing. I have made all the arguments, over many years, and have not made much progress.

    So, I taught her to operate my S&W Model 10, and she shoots it fairly well (paper plate accuracy in DA mode at 10 yards). I invite her to practice a lot, but she rarely accepts, so we don't move on beyond the 4" revolver. She is satisfied with that, and could use it if she had to, but must show much more interest before I would ever be confident for her to carry, or even have a gun in the car with her. In my opinion, she would have to be very lucky to ever be able to save her own life with a handgun. I'm not happy with the situation, but she is. After 41 years, I know when to back off, so I continue to wait for her to commit, but I'm not holding my breath.

    By all means, get her what she wants, but make sure she can handle it. This may require outside help, because sometimes that is what it takes to get their attention - a complete stranger saying exactly what you have been saying may have an entirely different effect.
    Steve M1911A1 and jtguns like this.

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    GCBHM is offline Senior Member
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    I agree with Steve. Although there may be a small number of women who really don't care to ever pick out their own gun, b/c they are just appeasing you, the majority want to pick out their own gun. I started my wife out on a full size M&P 45, Glock 17 and the Glock 26 so that she could see the difference. She thought she would like the Glock 26 best just handling them at the house, but after shooting all three she liked the Glock 17 much more than the other two, but picked the Glock 26 last of the three. Then we rented a couple other guns guns, a Glock 19 and a M&P Shield 9mm. I was convinced that she would like the G19 and want to get one, but she liked the Shield b/c it was small enough for her to carry, the recoil wasn't hard, and she was able to shoot it pretty well with it. So that is what she picked. To be honest, I was really surprised she picked it over the G19.

    Then we spent time at the range with her shooting, learning sight alignment, trigger control, etc. She does pretty well, and really likes shooting with me. But of all the guns we have shot to date, she said the one she likes the best was the Sig P226 MK25, which surprised me. It's a pretty large handgun (she is a petite 5'3" 120lbs), but it has great ergonomics and is an extremely smooth shooter. We've shot a lot from the Shield to a full size gov model 1911. Next to her Shield, she prefers full size pistols, but there is just something special about her Shield. She picked it out, and I bought it for her. It's "her gun", and that means something to her. She did not want a pink gun, btw.

  12. #12
    Steve M1911A1's Avatar
    Steve M1911A1 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bisley View Post
    ...My personal experience is that most women seem to be drawn to snub-nosed revolvers, for whatever reason. That's fine, if they can shoot them - most can't, without a lot of practice. My wife is very late to the game, and still not terribly interested in 'mastering' any firearm. She wants to be able to shoot one, but doesn't expect to ever need to shoot one, and thinks she is just too busy to waste time practicing. I have made all the arguments, over many years, and have not made much progress.

    So, I taught her to operate my S&W Model 10, and she shoots it fairly well (paper plate accuracy in DA mode at 10 yards). I invite her to practice a lot, but she rarely accepts, so we don't move on beyond the 4" revolver. She is satisfied with that, and could use it if she had to...
    We seem to be married to the same woman!

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    Steve M1911A1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by P245USER View Post
    ...It will be carried in her truck...
    This is a really, really bad idea!

    Teach her to carry it on her person.
    No, not in her purse. On her person.

    If she's not carrying it, it won't be there when she really needs it.
    If it's in her vehicle, and the vehicle gets stolen, or just broken-into, then she has just delivered a free gun to a criminal.
    If it's in her purse, and her purse gets snatched, she has just delivered a free gun to a very nearby criminal.

    Defensive handguns belong on the person, not in a purse or in the truck.
    jtguns likes this.

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    pic
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bisley View Post
    I agree with everything Steve said.

    My personal experience is that most women seem to be drawn to snub-nosed revolvers, for whatever reason. That's fine, if they can shoot them - most can't, without a lot of practice. My wife is very late to the game, and still not terribly interested in 'mastering' any firearm. She wants to be able to shoot one, but doesn't expect to ever need to shoot one, and thinks she is just too busy to "......."...........~~~
    I think we are married to the same woman ,lol. Very good.

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    Steve M1911A1's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pic View Post
    I think we are married to the same woman ,lol. Very good.
    Three of us?

    I wonder where Jean finds the time!

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    pic
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    Quote Originally Posted by Steve M1911A1 View Post
    Three of us?

    I wonder where Jean finds the time!
    Lol, didn't see your post, sorry bout that ,(lol,your response).

  17. #17
    PT111Pro is offline Member
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    Interesting treat.
    So you buy your wife a pistol?
    Why does not she buy the pistol herself and why do you think your wife is not smart enough to know or find out what she wants?
    It is an interesting set up anyway. First your wife seems not to know what she wants, than you have no idea about guns because you have to ask us.
    The scenario has something like the blind leads the blind.

    There is a old saying: Many ways leading to Rome. If you ask 10 people for the route you end up with 15 routs that leading somewhere but none of them leads to Rome.

    I'll think you should buy a WASR-10 7.62X39 for your wife. With that thing you can't go wrong and for just laying around in a truck is that OK too.

  18. #18
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    My typical "only handgun" recommendation for a casual owner is the Bersa Thunder .380

  19. #19
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    Give her a pile of cash, drive her to the candy store, sit in the car while she goes in to buy what she likes. Never ever open your mouth after that and say she should've got this one or that one.
    Steve M1911A1 likes this.

  20. #20
    shaolin's Avatar
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    I recommend a 9mm single stack pistol like the S&W Shield. For 10 yards or less I don't see why she would have any problems with it. I love mine and carry it daily while the other 30 odd pistols stay home. Don't get the .38spl snub nose as they are hard to shoot accurately; hell even after 20+ years of shooting I still have trouble hitting a pie plate at 25 yards with one.
    Sig Sauer make some single stack pistols also. If you want a Glock then by all means go for the Glock 19 or 42.

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