Hello everyone I am just out of a military service, and I now live in the San Francisco bay area.
I am sorry to hear that you live in SanFrancisco. No need to say why, because we all know.
I'm looking at purchasing a handgun for personal protection/home safety (plus time in the range), and don't really know where to turn. I wish I could just go for an M-4, because that's what I know and what I'm comfortable with, but I'd say a handgun is the way I'm headed.
How about the Standard issue side arm for the military. The Beretta 92. Ah, sorry, that is a all metal frame, much heavier than most polys loaded. Well there is the Beretta PX4.

Here is a review for the PX4 http://www.great-lakes.org/reviews/review-03-06-06.html and another http://www.policemag.com/Channel/Wea...ubcompact.aspx
Also there is the Bersa BP9CC a very nice and well built brand that does not get much advertisement here in the US but are top notch pistols. The BP9CC is their only poly and it is due out at the end of this year or early next.

I know you said you were not really interested in Glock but don't over look them. I did for a long time and regret it. Having recently purchased a G17 I was very impressed at how accurate and how little felt recoil this poly has in comparison to even many full size metal frame guns. If you are looking for the smaller brother to this gun, consider the G19.

The Walther P99 is a fine gun, but a new one will break your bank by a minimum of 100.00 as the new ones are starting at the 700.00 mark. You may be able to find them for less some place and if you can, they are well worth it.
Let me say too, that I have both poly and metal as most do these days and the best poly guns I have are Walther P99, Glock 17, XDm9mm and a recent purchase that really surprised me a HS2000 the predecessor of the XD.
In my humble opinion any one of these guns would be fine for what you are talking about, though the XDm might be a bit large frame wise.
I live with my girlfriend, and I want something that she will have an easy time firing as well, which is why I'm relatively set on a 9mm, as opposed to a .40 cal. The velocities are roughly the same, from what I understand,
Actually I think the velocities of a 40SW are closer to a +P9mm or a +P+9mm. a much hotter load than the standard 9mm.
and the.40 doesn't really do all that much more damage.
This is true if you are shooting quality defensive rounds.
That said, it's the accuracy and ease of firing multiple successive rounds for both myself and my girlfriend that I have the 9mm in mind.
I want something relatively compact and (preferably) with a polymer frame. Money, unfortunately is an issue. I'd like to have a limit of 600 dollars, but I'll spend more if I can find something I love.
Reliability and Accuracy are KEY!!!
Again the polys I mentioned above will all fill this need.
That said, I have to love the look of the gun, which is why I'm straying from the glock. I've been looking at a few guns in particular. First off, I love the Jericho (baby eagle) polymer compact. Also, the Walther p99 is a great looking gun (never held it though). And I've heard great things about the SIG's - I was thinking maybe a p229 or 239 (don't really know the difference) or a p250 (which I've heard mixed things about).
I would appreciate any info on the handguns I just mentioned - reviews, comparisons, opinions on which are best, etc.
Also, if there are other guns that I didn't mention that you think might fit the bill, let me know.
Thanks in advance for your time an patience in dealing with a handgun newb....