SuckLead: Ma'am; stating the obvious first: you have dis-similar products.
Wood being the softer, filler the harder.
Two different ways: 1. sanding sealer 2. blending
Should you use the 1. sanding sealer; it will raise the grain and you will have to sand it smooth; maybe 2 coats. [no condescending statements from me]
just follow along.
Sanding sealer will fill all the grain; will dry relatively quickly; re' sand; recoat
re' sand. The wood will now be slick as all get out. Hard flexible product this 'sanding sealer' The 'blonde' coloring will now commence. Oil stain or water color? Oil will get you started better i.e. toward your goal; color, and preservation.
Staining will be entirely different compared to bare wood. wipe, sponge, rag, what-ever to get the stain on wood. Allow stain to sit approx. 3-5 minutes; wipe to coloring subjectivity. Doesn't suite you. Recolor after 8-12 hours. Blending with a rag. allow 24-48 hours to dry; use urethane to top coat. Coat lightly; allow a tackie surface; re-coat. Spray bomb will be fine.
Allow 24 hrs. and maybe recoat.
2. Blending; make surface wet with stain; allow 3-5 minuets sitting; use soft stroke ragging; end to end. use deliberate strokes. you should be able to find the pressure angle that you need. Maybe several coatings. Re-coat with urethane spray. Several coats. Hard and durable flexible.
Personally: I'd use the sanding sealer method
let us know with pictures what you did.