A vampire once flew into my window, so I waved a cross at him.
"Naah—Won't work on me," he said in a heavy Yiddish accent.

Silver is for weir wolves.

Originally Posted by Steve M1911A1

A vampire once flew into my window, so I waved a cross at him.
"Naah—Won't work on me," he said in a heavy Yiddish accent.

Those are a real PITA. I hear they can be very sarcastic too!

I would rather use silver 00 buck, that way when he changes into a bat I can still hit him.

and the vampire said, " I vant to bite your, OY VEY."

Originally Posted by Steve M1911A1

A vampire once flew into my window, so I waved a cross at him.
"Naah—Won't work on me," he said in a heavy Yiddish accent.

He must have called in for Fangsgiving.

I'll get my coat.

I knew one vampire who preferred to bite women on their bosoms.
He was always singing, "Fangs for the mammaries..."


(I'll hide behind the ghost of Bob Hope.)

You guys are not taking this subject seriously. When your windows rattle on a dark and moonless night, hiding under the bedclothes might not be enough to save your pimply asses.

I'm puttin all of you on my ignore list.

That really is enough lame 'Fang' jokes.

Fang you very much

Originally Posted by Unarmedwelshman

He must have called in for Fangsgiving.

I'll get my coat.

Something really bothers me, so I've got to ask:
If you are an unarmed Welshman, what are you typing on your keyboard with? Your toes?

I can make jokes that are even worse, but instead:
If you are unarmed, how do you handle all those "...English foemen, English spearmen, English bowmen"?

And:
A very rotund Harry Seacomb once said, "I'm from Wales," to which Peter Sellers replied, "Well, you certainly didn't come from minnows!"


Shall we end the hijacking now?

It's been rumored these will not work on Zombies. What would be the proper load for both Vampires and Zombies??

I hear Speer is coming out with a line of Gold Dot ammo that have garlic infused in the hollow point in case of vampires. No news on zombie loads though.

Originally Posted by Popeye7751

It's been rumored these will not work on Zombies. What would be the proper load for both Vampires and Zombies??

I suggest .45 ACP, 230 grains at 850fps.
For zombies, head-shots will suffice. Remember: "Braaaaaains...braaaaains!"
For vampires, the job is more difficult: Aim for the fangs. A double-tap should do the trick.

As always, bullet placement trumps ballistics—especially on vampires.

Well the ignore setting in my UserCP did not have a Silver Bullet option. So that's worthless.

As for hijacking the thread, it was a pretty silly topic to start with. You can fly it to Cuba for all I care.

Actually I kind of enjoyed it. Gonna bookmark those bullets or maybe just buy some for Christmas gifts for my sons and BIL next year. In the meantime I'm going to email Speer and check on the progress of the vampire/zombie load project.

Originally Posted by meshugunner

...You can fly it to Cuba for all I care.

Years ago, in the late '60s, you could hire the Goodyear blimp for a very nominal fee, so all of us who worked in my leather shop got together and bought an hour of blimp time.
Our ride almost didn't happen.
As we boarded the blimp, my chief assistant brandished a huge sewing needle, and then asked the pilot, "Does this thing have enough gas to get us to Cuba?"
The co-pilot wanted to throw us off, but the pilot had himself a good laugh, and the ride proceeded.

Good one Steve.

Well I ordered a box. Following Popeye's thinking, I will hand out a few pairs to friends in appreciation for favors they have done for me. I would have liked to have given out a cylinder full to each but at $5 a round that's a bit much for me.

This thread was a lot of fun. Thanks all.

.327fed mag 100gr xtp 12.2 grs. 296. I'm glad I came here this evening, lots of good laughs enjoyed it. thanks for the mammaries

Well my silver bullets arrived. They come packed 8 inside a wooden stake. There's a whole page of warnings on the back of the package:

WARNING! This is live ammo. Do not drop or misuse. Ammunition is very dangerous...yata..yata.
WARNING! This ammo is not recommended on vampires as it will only make them mad.
WARNING! The Stake has a sharp pointy end that can impale you . Avoid the sharp end and be careful around others.
WARNING! If any of these WARNINGS are news to you, this might not be the ideal product for you to own.
WARNING! If you are confronted by a Werewolf, Vampire or Zombie, STOP drinking. Hand your keys and this kit to a friend. It's probably just Halloween.

Reality strikes again!