Several of the Walmarts in my area carry a Remington/UMC .38 Special +P load that is pretty close to what you are seeking. It has a jacketed hollowpoint bullet and a higher velocity, so it is more expensive than the cheap .38 target ammo (but significantly less than the magnum ammo), and it shoots VERY well in several of my revolvers (one is a .38 Special caliber, the other is a short-barreled .357 Magnum).

It comes in a taller-than-normal box, as it contains two vertically-stacked 50-round trays of ammo. Here is what the end flap of the box looks like (clipped out of another photo that I had handy):



I haven't bought any of it in several months, so I'm not sure what the current price is, but I remember it was more than two boxes of the cheap .38 FMJ/target ammo, and less than the similar 100-round box of .357 ammo, so I'm thinking it was around $38-$40 (remember, this is for 100 shots, not 50). Good stuff; it's about the only factory-made ammo I use in my old S&W .38 nowadays. SEE 2nd EDIT, BELOW.

EDITED TO ADD: That Dan Wesson is a fine revolver, and if you find some ammo it likes, it may well astound you. A friend had a similar DW revolver many years ago, and I remember him shooting 6 shots into a single ragged hole at 10-15 yards with boring regularity, and his favorite magnum ammo would keep 6 shots under two inches at a full 25 yards, if he did his part.

If you shoot .38 ammo in your .357, don't forget to clean each chamber well when you are finished, or you might get a build-up of crud near where the end of the .38 casings release the bullet. If you try to shoot the longer .357 ammo in a chamber still dirty from shooting .38 ammo, the .357 casings may stick or be very hard to extract from the cylinder, due to the ring of fouling left by the shorter-cased .38 ammo. In extreme cases, major fouling can raise the pressures when .357 ammo is fired, causing other problems.

2nd EDIT: Price of this Rem/UMC .38 +P ammo is currently $33.97 per 100 rounds; just picked up a new box on 10-9-12.

you might want to compare the muzzle energy of the 9mm round to the 38/357 cartridges as a starting point
you can go to the link below to start
Ballistics 101 | All the ballistic charts. Finally, in one place

You will have a great deal of difficuty attempting to make the revolver and semiauto feel close to the same. If you loaded your own ammo it would be possible to adjust one up and the other down in recoil and meet midway but doubtfull with factory ammo.

The two guns are never going to feel the same.

You will probably be best served by using .38spl in the revolver and standard plinking ammo in the Pistol.

Well they dont have to be dead on but it seems that 158 magnum load it pretty hot and the 38s feel pretty soft. I think the P+ 38 is what im looking for.

When i posted this i didnt know about a P+ and i did more reading and found a couple posts here about Muzzle Energy and Muzzle Velocity.

At first i thought maybe it had something to do with the grain but i shot a 148 grain 38 and it was pretty soft as well so i think i need to look more at the muzzle energy and velocity

I agree it is a VERY accurate gun. I love it, i think my dad spent alot of time adjusting it and it really shoots good. There is a Ruger Mark 1 .22 that shows alot of use as well and that little thing is about as accurate as the 357

The P89 he said he didnt like and that thing is all over the place. I dont think he shot it much at all.

Went and picked-up another box of that Remington/UMC at Walmart yesterday, and the price was $33.97 for 100 rounds (lower price than I remembered, and posted, above). I think I'll try to get out to the range this weekend and shoot the old .38 a bit. It's been a while since I've taken it out for a spin (pun intended).

BowerR64, the Ruger P89 wasn't really ever known as a particularly accurate gun. It was promoted as a less-expensive high-capacity 9mm pistol, at a time when high-capacity 9mms were either hard to find and/or significantly more expensive. The Ruger Mark I .22 pistol, on the other hand, was a very popular entry-level handgun for new NRA-style 2700 bullseye target shooters, and many of these guys used the MK-I for years and years before their skills reached the level where they thought they actually needed a more accurate gun. I have a slightly newer MK-II 22/45 model, and from years of experience I know if I miss, it is my fault, not the gun.