Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    shootingftw is offline Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Posts
    16

    Great Video or POS?

    I just made a video for this company. It was a "contest" of sorts between a few interns. It's not a straight up commercial, they wanted something a little bit vague. Anyway, it seems like they are going to use it as it made it up on their page. But it's still a 1st version so I would like some input on what you think about it and what minor edits I can make to give it just slightly more of a commercial feel w/o changing the video entirely.

    I'm stoked about it making the site, but at the same time, I'm just not too happy with the finished product for some reason.

    I know the girl isnt HOT, but at least she has big milk dispensers. Hahaha.

    Last edited by js; 10-28-2009 at 10:27 PM. Reason: link changed to youtube page

  2. #2
    js's Avatar
    js
    js is offline Administrator
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    NC, USA
    Posts
    3,064
    embedded the video in your post. I first thought you were trying slip in some "spam", I hope that's not the case.
    "bing bang boom! hair out...hamburger time" - William Murderface

  3. #3
    Steve M1911A1's Avatar
    Steve M1911A1 is online now Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Northwest Washington State
    Posts
    5,385
    The commercial you made tells me exactly nothing about your product or service!
    Are you selling coffee? Cell phones? Cameras? Laptop computers? Girls with big mammaries? (All of those were featured in the video.)
    Or am I supposed to sell you (or her) something?

    Your advertisement does not make me want to use your auction site, even though I finally figured out what the ad was about. I don't believe that the girl wants to use your auction site either, since she seems to have nothing to sell except herself (and that's more appropriate to Craig's List).

    She's, well, cute and perky; and your ad is, well, cute and perky...but it doesn't do the job you want it to do.

    Tell me, in simple images, why I should use your site. Answer this question: What's the benefit to me?
    You haven't told me any of that.
    That's why you, yourself, are made to feel that your own ad isn't working.
    It isn't working because it doesn't answer those two very basic questions that every ad should quickly answer: Why should I go to you? And, what's in it for me?

  4. #4
    MLB's Avatar
    MLB
    MLB is offline Supporting Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Buffalo, NY
    Posts
    971
    The line drawing to reality thing is a neat tool, but I think you need to better employ it to sell the product (Think it, get it. And by the way, use this site). I'm assuming that it's an auction site of some sort.

Links

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

» Springfield Armory

» HGF Sponsors

Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v4.2.1