Bush to Move Lou Dobbs to the Mexican Border (Satire)
Bush to Move Lou Dobbs to the Mexican Border
Anchorman will serve as barrier to illegal immigrants
Updated: 12:37 p.m. ET May 16, 2006
May 16, 2006 - In his toughest stand yet against illegal immigration, President George W. Bush today announced that he would move CNN anchorman Lou Dobbs to the United States' border with Mexico.
The move is a reversal for the president, who one day earlier had announced that he was moving 6,000 National Guard troops to the Mexican border. The decision to dispatch Mr. Dobbs, Bush said, means that the deployment of Guard troops is no longer necessary.
"It is my belief that America's most powerful weapon against illegal immigration has always been and will always be Lou Dobbs," Bush said in a nationally televised address.
Speaking from his studio in New York, Dobbs said he would continue broadcasting his nightly "Moneyline" program from the Mexican border while keeping an eye out for illegal aliens trying to sneak across it.
Mexican president Vicente Fox, who was already concerned by Bush's decision to send troops to the border, was incensed today by the decision to deploy the CNN anchorman, calling the move "an act of intimidation."
"I could live with American troops on my border, but Lou Dobbs is another thing entirely," Fox told reporters in Mexico City.
While many in Congress questioned the decision, with some expressing concern about the cost of maintaining Dobbs, Bush strongly defended the move.
"It was a choice between building a massive wall and sending Lou Dobbs," he said. "Lou Dobbs was cheaper."
Elsewhere, media mogul Rupert Murdock threw his support to Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY), as was first reported in the Book of Revelation.
© 2006 Newsweek, Inc.
I was in tears both laughing/mad :x the other day when he had his presidential address talking about immigration. He has the audacity to get up there and say things like "We need to secure our borders", "The job of any sovereign nation is to secure it's borders". Who the hell does this guy think he's talking to? Canadians? Where the heck has he been for the past 6+ years? It's really sad that this guy is our president....any Bush supporters can bash me, but that's my opinion....well that's pretty much 80% of the population's opinion. I can't believe I voted for this guy....
NEWS FLASH!!! You, along with every other president in this half-century are about 50+ years too late.
All well and good but do you REALLY believe the president has diddly for actual power??????? The congress and senate run this country and they're to busy callin each other crooks and Idiots to look in the mirror and see the ones to blame for the sickening state they have put this country in :x
Bush is a member of one of the most powerful families in all of America...if not THE most powerful now with the way the oil prices have been. His father and himself both have direct ties to the Saudi's, this is not uncommon knowledge, yet people seem to still wonder why gas prices are so high. Well folks, it's because they TAX the living SH1T out of the oil that is sold to consumers. They are getting RICHER by the second...literally. Where do you think they are making up the huge deficit?
Trust me, his FATHER runs this country. With the money, power and influence those 2 men have, you don't think they can control the Senate and Congress? They throw their weight around like a 600lb gorilla.
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