a site to behold.
Subject: Top this for a speeding ticket
Two California Highway Patrol Officers were conducting speeding enforcement on I-15 near MCAS Miramar. One of the officers was using a hand held radar device to check speeding vehicles approaching near the crest of a hill. The officers were suddenly surprised when the radar gun began reading 300 miles per hour. The officer attempted to reset the radar gun, but it would not reset and turned off. Just then a deafening roar over the treetops revealed that the radar had in fact locked onto a USMC F/A-18 Hornet which was engaged in a low flying exercise near the location. Back at the CHP Headquarters the Patrol Captain fired off a complaint to the USMC Base Commander. Back came a reply in true USMC style:
Thank you for the message, which allows us to complete the file on this incident. You may be interested to know that the tactical computer in the Hornet had detected the presence of, and subsequently locked onto your hostile radar equipment and automatically sent a jamming signal back to it. Furthermore, an air to ground missile aboard the fully armed aircraft had also automatically locked onto your equipment. Fortunately the Marine Pilot flying the Hornet recognized the situation for what it was, quickly responded to the missile system alert status and was able to override the automated defense system before the missile was launched and your hostile radar was destroyed. Thank you for your concerns.
(yes i checked snopes, yes its false, it's still funny and this is offbeat)
a site to behold.
Along similar lines: A Florida senior citizen bought a brand new Corvette convertible. He took off down the road, accelerating to 80mph with ease, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head.
"This is great," he thought as he motored down I-75. He sped up some more; the ‘Vette still had plenty left. He opened her up some more. “This is livin’!” That’s when he heard the siren. He looked in his rear view mirror and saw a highway patrol trooper behind him; his blue lights were flashing.
"I can get away from him with no problem", thought the man; he tromped on it. The speedometer read 100mph, 120mph, 140mph. He was pulling away and soon he was out of sight of the trooper!
Then he thought, "What the heck am I doing? I'm too old to be doing this kind of thing."
He pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the trooper to pull up behind him. The trooper got out of his cruiser and approached the Corvette, asking for the man’s license, vehicle registration and proof of insurance.
While waiting for the driver to gather the paperwork from his wallet and glove compartment, the officer looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes and today is Friday. If you can give me a good reason why you were speeding, something I’ve never heard before, I'll let you go."
The man thought a moment, then said, “Years ago my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper; I thought you were bringing her back."
"Have a good day, Sir," said the Trooper.