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Thread: Lab report

  1. #1
    2400's Avatar
    2400 is offline Senior Member
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    Lab report

    Lab Report

    A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgery. As
    she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope
    and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet
    shook his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, Cuddles has
    passed away."

    The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?

    "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.

    "How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't
    done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma
    or something."

    The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and
    returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As
    the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his
    hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and
    sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with
    sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it
    out, and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The
    cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird.
    The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed
    softly and strolled out of the room.

    The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said,
    this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

    Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and
    produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The duck's
    owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!", she cried, "$150 just
    to tell me my duck is dead?!!"

    The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill
    would have been only $20, but what with the Lab Report and the
    Cat Scan ...

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  3. #2
    Baldy's Avatar
    Baldy is offline Senior Member
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    ROTFLMAO!!

  4. #3
    john doe. is offline Banned
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